Message with Colicchie today on Facebook
Oh collegiately no to give a testimony first you must survive the test i’m feeling like i’m dying from these drugs that i injected i can go in either arm left the right i’m ambidextrous must always desolate my spirit is the fact that i keep making wrong decisions that will never get corrected i’m doing what i have to never care about the record i keep chasing
This huh but i can’t ever seem to catch it i told you my story now let me go a little deeper i was dealing with a chemical that’s deadlier than ether i never show respect living on the verge of death cause his hair when will kill me smother murder on his breath i’m walking on this tightrope as i’m watching every step now i’m living on the run i never sleep i never
Rest i’m having trouble breathing from the pressure on my dress this anxiety is killing me suffocating from stress the resin is i’m staying at is filthy it’s a mess but i can’t leave until this back is gone and there is nothing left so i’m stuck feeling empty suicidal thoughts are present the essence of my depression wants me dead without a question the is here
My blood my whole family suffers but sister’s getting high with me we’re smoking like a muffler my mother’s an alcoholic the addiction is intense before the left in 84 we haven’t seen him since he chose drugs over yeah i get it it’s impossible to stops another’s crumbs and i’m coming i’m bombing in the sink every morning i rub the complexion i my skin is grain
Looking like a duck i guess i’ll take his money him and i were never close i would push the bike rack but somebody saw me so i never paid for nothing as i’m headed towards the door you can try to come and catch me as i’m running out the store although one is jobs all i ever need is for me and my sister we pass the needle back and forth blood is dripping off my
Arm starts falling to the floors we manipulate the later watch that flame hit the jaw she’s pushing on the stem i try to wait my turn every tear appears like i discovered this cigarette burns i’m living a life that sprout never critically-acclaimed my arms are black and blue i try to hit another vein it’s gonna take an hour why every veins collapsed should i clean
It out with bleach i don’t even have to ask there’s no let it go is sandstone see i married to that you don’t never touch it methadone my moves are unpredictable my actions are erratic and that spike is in my home i’m gonna die using addict i’m drinking alcohol until i fall apart that’s the room is spinning slowly to the toilet did i crawl this for another train
Tonight shot after shot after shot after shot through this just a drama thoughts everything is blurry i could never read the manuscript everything i’m doing every decision is cancerous i would crash i could never find the landing stress ecstasy and mushrooms together i used to candy that was back when these trucks they were fun now i’m anna colden a surreal monster
I’ve become heroines my god i follow orders that are shrek you see i’m just a crew member it’s the captain of the ship the stem so i call it off trying use a damp rag i’m filming so alone as i’m pouring out these sandbags i’m pulling on the belt to every vein is visible every day i’m overwhelmed stressed living miserable the drug game i’m always losing like i’m
Gamble and i see she isn’t breathing so i call another ambulance with ice lows no guidance no type of management every day is death and crime i can’t handle this i’m blowing up the smokers i’m peaking past the currents down my house is four rounds that i see the shadows now i’m nervous chef they’re coming to get me okay maybe i’m this parent no no everyone be
Quiet i’m a stylist not another noise drilling the boyd i’m surely losing my mind i’m using my license when i’m chopping up these lines trying to stay alive is how i really spend my time i’m coming and guilt and shame let me tell you about a friend of mine she’s thought about it she sold everything she sold a house car even saw a wedding ring she saw and they get
Sicker she’s turning another trick and she don’t want to live this way sucking dick from another his you think it’s funny put yourself in her shoes and imagine what it’s like to have no option to choose and we’re so quick to judge another but what if the song was about your mother do you think you’d understand and still love all i do is lie never tell the truth my
Neighbors see him sick so i tell him i got the flu i rented out my car he did take it huh my dealer has my vehicle i see him driving by track box i’ve had him since i was younger i’m wearing long sleeves in the middle of the summer the paramedics took my needle spoon and buzzbundle why you hit me was narcan interrupting my slumber i turn into my father maybe this
Is a i’m supposed to serve a purpose while i’m living out my dreams i turn to tell my father i’m nauseous sick to my stomach chaotic or narcotics this isn’t the life i wanted i turn into my father on the devil in the flesh i never have comedy says i’m settling for less and i hate when i become so now i wanna hit my life form in search of a loaded gun feeling
Lost and broken all i ever do is hurt my mother’s in the other room i’m taking money out her purse i tried to mess the pain but it only made it worse then i finally hit a point where the drugs are no longer work i’m killing myself slowly i just want to feel some freedom my thoughts are paralyzed and that’s i’m battling these demons i used to tell myself that i would
Be better off that i stopped listening to the voices that are inside of my head i wanna change i need to be a son to my mother my brother to my sister look i’m tired of the struggle my obsession has been lifted but destruction i can crave but i’m doing what it takes so i don’t see an early grave i thank god i hit a bottom now he carries me i dented what my mother
Insisted i have to bury me i father many times finally got my life together cuz i kept trying never quit through every failed endeavor nowadays these parents they are bury and their kids are dying younger and younger the navigator chance to live i’m trying to show the world hope regardless of what i did and that is truly why do this it gets everything i gave i had
Multiple years clean twice but then i lost it now my daily maintenance it is suffocated and cautioning i tread softly no tradition violations the luggage they be a loser now my life’s truly amazing i try to be a service you can find that in our symbol i used to be shaky but now i’m steady like a gamble like i put my hands together every night to pray and some
Smoking drinking coffee relaxing but jimmy k i had to write a sequel do before our people we all have our own issues but understand that we eat in a week there’s many days that i want to give up a news that my misery refunded i’ve done it it’s nothing new now i’m staring at my daughter and she’s altering my mood she’s the underlying force and everything i ever
Do my daughter is my everything and that’ll never change i can’t wait until she’s old enough and sees what i became i love my daughter but she won’t keep me clean see the drugs are just a symptom now i’m fighting to be free i try to separate all my wants and my needs i’m working on myself i learned acceptance is the cage the kid threw it over trying to spread a
Positive message i’m dedicated to death with every breath i invested i’m constantly pushing i got this fire in my eyes this is all my dead friends is what’s giving me my tribe i try to play my part but could always be doing more to call it a battle i call it a losing war we gotta come together my experiences where you can’t identify with what i did relate to how
I feel no pedestal was needed i am very far from gifted we all felt the same pain but our stories might be different was any brush i’ll paint a picture of him an image but the message doesn’t have a meaning unless i live it i defy the odds were miracles living proof i’m alive to tell my story and i’m sharing it with you it’s god’s grace and mercy the reason i’m
Still alive i’m watching fred juicing it is let me aside to anyone that’s trying to change the life here my idle life will have its ups and downs but i’m no longer suicidal nowadays these artists they disclose father drops see i’m trying to do it differently and core for the love and you can’t rush me but i’m proud of my accomplishments my name is jeff smith and
I refuse to be anonymous i used to dream of living now i’m living my dreams no matter what it takes my goal is to die clean clean clean clean no matter where this place my hope is that i clean dry clean no matter what it takes my goal is that i cleaned i clean no matter what it takes my goal is the dark reign die clean no matter what it takes my goal is the dock clean clean
Transcribed from video
Colicchie " Drug Addiction Part 2 " ( Prod By Big Jerm ) By Colicchie