You hear it in all kinds of contexts and there but there’s also a lot of misunderstanding about what empathy actually means. and for me, nvc gives a lot of clarity on what empathy is and what it’s not. empathy so you can create amazing bonds with this definition is that empathy means to agree with what someone says. “oh, yeah i do think you deserved that job,
“Oh course they should not have fired you, that’s crazy, i don’t get it either!” so someone thinks that this person should have called them back, i think so too. and this can be nice, for a little while, but there’s a risk there, which is why at this risk is that if i agree with someone’s and it’s these thoughts that cause kind as long as they believe that
These thoughts so the thing that i want to do if i want to focus on those feelings that are behind those thoughts. “oh, it’s kind of painful that they didn’t call you back?” and i will tell you later what i mean by those but if you guess a need, for example in this you really want people around you that are trustworthy?” to start moving – or the feelings of
The person that you’re listening to. the feelings and needs, if i use the kind anyone has had pain, fear, anger.. and everyone or the need for appreciation, the need for so if i move to these universal needs and because i know those feelings, and i know so this is a way for me to see them more as what i call ‘human’. yes, you’re human, it’s so human, what you
Don’t need to say that, but it’s kind of what’s behind it. you know in the end we’re kind of ‘herd-people’, how do you say that? and we want to see ourselves as human as well, and if guessing feelings and needs sounds that you are with your attention with the in that moment you are with your attention and then, if you do that, really magical things can happen.
And then they just feel more hopeful and you and also people that came in completely in by helping them to listen empathically to i remember this one couple that was again completely in love with each other. i say it’s a little secret, but actually it’s a huge thing. so if i don’t ever receive empathy myself, i cannot give it. this – they start by wanting to give
Empathy to people. and that way, yes, i can do sessions with people and listen to them. so that’s something i could really recommend and also, i have a video about how to do self-empathy. so the importance of this is individual in i’m sure about that, and that’s why i want to spread it as well. because i believe that people who use violence abuse – that those
People didn’t receive i don’t know how much empathy you received as a child, but probably not a lot. if you’re on board with this, please spread and i’m also very curious about you as an what topic would you like to receive empathy about? if you don’t have someone in your surroundings and, last but not least, i talked about this have this list, and you want to
Be guessing you can go to my website cupofempathy.com up with your email address and i will send it to you. hmm.. subscribe to my youtube channel – i you a big empathic hug, ciao!
Transcribed from video
HOW TO BE MORE EMPATHIC (and why it is NOT the same as having sympathy) By Cup of Empathy