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Life – Prozac, Ritalin, & Boys

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Hello friends how are you happy sunday i just left the gym as you can see it’s been a while it’s been a while since i’ve made a video for youtube since i talked to you guys a lot of stuff is no actually you know not a lot of stuff has been going on i just preoccupied myself with different things and just why don’t i kind of just give you kind of an update on what’s

Going on in my life everyday everyday life and everyday whatever so wow what what is that that’s my life you guys can’t even put my hair in a ponytail correctly yeah so i guess a few things have been going on the same ol i take prozac every day i take it every day in the morning same time every day and that’s really helped me because obviously if you are not on

Track with your medication it’s not going it’s going to throw what you’re just gonna throw off your body cycle it’s gonna throw off your hormones your chemicals you know your whatever so it makes sense so anyways i’ve gained like 10 pounds this is wonderful i haven’t been going to the gym today was the second day today is june 30th okay and today is the second

Day that i went to the gym in the month of june and if you’ve been around at all if you’ve seen any of my videos you know that is not typical i just stopped going i got preoccupied with other things i made excuses and i didn’t make it a high priority in my life and it’s so it’s just wild to me that it can just go from being so important the number one important

Thing in my life to something i don’t really care about anymore not that i don’t care about it but i don’t i’m not putting it i’m not playing at first so one of the reasons why i haven’t been going to the gym a lot is because i’ve been dating and dating dating takes up a lot of your life a dating is exhausting for many reasons but also on the reason that if you’re

Actually dating and seeing a person a lot it takes up a lot of your time and especially when it’s not just the weekends so i’ve been dating this guy i’ve been seeing this guy for like three weeks now a month we’ve been talking for like a month which is the longest i’ve talked to anyone ever seen anyone since um since my last breakup so it’s a it’s a it’s a big

Move in that in that sense also tim it’s exhausting it’s a lot to do and it’s not that i don’t want to you because if i didn’t want to i wouldn’t do it right but it’s just taking up syncing of my life taking up my extra time and i don’t necessarily like that i’m choosing not to also prioritize the gym and i realized that this weekend i’ve just been kind of been

Going around like a bender of per se and just kind of doing whatever not really how do you guys just not not putting my health first and not not feeling like i need to either so it’s a strange thing so i’ve i also got on ritalin which is has been a game changer for me for work i’m i’m taking ten milligrams twice a day in it’s like it’s the the one that lasts like

Four hours or something four to six hours and i was taking it twice a day but it was giving me massive headaches so i’m only taking it in the morning or as needed i’m going to i’m going back to my psychologist and in a couple of weeks just to give them an update on how it’s going with with ritalin and maybe and tell him about my headaches and maybe i’ll switch to

Extended release i’m not sure but i am going through that process getting adjusted to ritalin it has helped me quite a bit of work know that for sure i don’t take it on the weekend i don’t really feel like i need to take it on the weekend so that i’m just kind of going through the motions with that and so with dating you know dating dating silicon valley it’s very

Interesting silicon valley is full of engineers and i technically a climate engineer i studied to be an engineer i don’t do that in my day job now but i do have engineering my applied so i do understand the concept of being an introvert and also dating and being a very analytical and being analytical with dating it just doesn’t work out it’s very frustrating for

A female like myself who wants attention and who wants some kind of empathy and emotional support and spot take spontaneity i want you to like go and like be adventurous find i want you to like push me out of my little comfort zone and guys out here in silicon valley just simply or not that at least the ones that i gravitate towards the ones that are my type i am

I am attracted to nerds yes i’m attracted to the typical silicon valley dude it’s just i have to have a i have to have a lot of patience when dating a guy out here and so i’m kind of just going through that with this guy right now i don’t really i’m not really sure if it’s going anywhere but we’ll see and i really don’t want to restrict myself to just one person

So i’m really pushing myself out of that comfort zone so you may be dating other people dating wrong meet new people and i just continue to be free oh it’s so cliche and so cheesy but that’s what it is yeah and so therapy has been going pretty well for me for the last mr. pete’s coffee here yeah i’ve been going to therapy for about a month and a half now i really

Have but six sessions and he’s great he’s really helping me realize some of the things that i may have used in the past that were like defense mechanisms and helping me grow and really you know honestly the biggest thing that he is having me do is sit with that emotion that i have is to sit with it because i’m very quick to say i don’t know is this oh this is place

Open oh my god store hours coffee is not open he i’m very quick to say i don’t know i don’t know i don’t know i don’t know instead of actually sitting with sitting with myself what is this it’s this is pete’s coffee all right as they come to the wrong place to really sit with my emotion and understand what that emotion is and how to deal with it um so it’s it’s

Been good so if you guys are if you guys are thinking about getting a therapist or started working through therapist and me it may feel that it’s not going anywhere just keep going keep keep at it and also just be sure to listen to yourself because sometimes you’re a therapist and you are just not a great match i know i can say the one thing that i really honestly

Didn’t like about my therapist is that he he makes me start the conversation he makes me talk instead of him initiate the conversation and he initiate questions he makes me talk and that’s really frustrating for me he pushes me he’s right but i like that’s another thing it’s like i’ll sit there and i’ll say i don’t know just talk about like what i have no idea and

That’s really just me just missing what is going on and not actually sitting and dealing with it no all right you’re right you know you’re right robbie anyways that’s what’s going on with me for the last month or so i’ve i’ve been painting painting is a big thing for me right now i kind of i was like oh not painting hi for a couple of days and and then i started

Doubting myself and stuff and stopped painting for a couple of weeks and just continued smoking and i’m still doing that and i really had i just really want to get out of about habits that i have and i know that the only bet the only way to get out of the bad habits that i’ve created for myself is to just stop doing them and that’s that’s that’s it you’ve made

Yourself comfortable in those bad habits and those bad habits are now part of your life what makes you comfortable nobody likes to be uncomfortable right so i’m i really need to dedicate and focus on that maybe for the month of july i told myself the month of july july is my birthday month i’m turning 30 – i’m turning 30 – this month and maybe it’s time for me to

Snap the out of it you know i don’t know it’s just i need to change up my habits i need to do better and i have to want to do better first before i can make myself change and so right now i admittedly don’t want it bad enough right now i’m okay right now i just know that if i keep doing it it’s not gonna be good all right well that’s all that’s going on right now

I’m gonna go ahead and in this vlog but um you guys if i don’t know tell me tell me what how your day is tell me tell me how your week’s been tell me how your months been tell me do you have any plans for july do you have any vacation plans oh i sold my house that’s a good news and stole my house and so now i’m kind of planning on like having a big vacation after

I sell it after i get that money i forget that coin all right oh my god have a good name bye

Transcribed from video
Life – Prozac, Ritalin, & Boys By MentallyHellthyliveBroadcastDetails{isLiveNowfalsestartTimestamp2019-06-30T173350+0000endTimestamp2019-06-30T174601+0000}